For the last week, the term "Mother's Day" crept up quite a few times. If it's not from general conversations it's from advertisements on the billboards or on TV (not to mention the many posts on facebook either).
In the first year I have lost you I don't think it registered to me yet that I truly don't have a mum anymore. It's so unreal that I believed that you would go into my room and make me wake up to get ready to go to work- or when I come home from work there's one of my favourite dishes that you whipped up waiting for me to devour on the dining table.
What small, warm moments that I can never relive again, but can only come back to in my memories...
Last year, on Mother's Day, I was ok. Or so I thought I was, until I broke down at church when the choir sang the most wonderful and beautiful song about a mother nurturing their child to be the best they can ever be.
It affected me so much that today, the only thing I can do is to avoid it all together.
This week, just a reminder about Mother's day had my throat choking up, my nose hot and my eyes watery. I've always had control over my emotions (as Kevin knows, I can keep a serious face when I'm being tickled ;) ) but I wonder, why am I this upset? Doesn't this get better over time?
I see all the photos of mother's being hugged by their lovely children on social media, and back then I've always taken that for granted. Back then, on Mother's Day, I'll be like "Damn, I gotta wake up early to make mum breakfast again". You would always made us kids breakfast, not to mention lunch and dinner for me everyday yet you never complained about it. But just that one day where roles were reversed, it was so bothersome.
I couldn't handle being with people I know today so I went to church at Werribee instead. After going to church by myself, I went to a nearby cafe and sat down with a book to take myself away from the real world. I got distracted by families on the other tables, bringing their mothers out for some brunch/lunch, showing a sign of gratitude just because it was a day that you were expected to. There needs to be more love in the world for Mothers, not just to celebrate that one day only. But in reality, especially in the society we live in, we can't even take time to look after ourselves let alone show some appreciation to our hard working mothers. So a day like today- embrace it and don't take it for granted.
PS: I chose the table with yellow tulips... I love tulips and so did you mum :)
Like I said, I wanted to get myself distracted and I really did. It's been 3 months since I've came in (always had a small latte- takeaway) and the coffee here tasted quite good so I ordered a regular caramel latte and sat down with my book waiting for it to come out. After the placed down my coffee, what distracted me the most was the state of the spoon they gave me. I was horrified! Lucky I didn't need to use it but still, it was just so dirty!
I was contemplating whether I should leave it or I should tell them (Kevin gets so embarrassed when I complain- but we as customers have every right to if something is not right!) but first of all, its quite busy in the cafe- all the workers wearing out their shoes from rushing around and secondly, I didn't want to make a scene. I was by myself like I said, so what guts did I have to come up to the counter and say, "Dude, your spoon is filthy!".
So I sat there, reading my book, sipped some coffee, and my eyes would fall back at the dirty spoon again. The time I spent in the cafe reading my book to the time spent staring at the spoon, the ratio would probably be 6:4. I couldn't shake it off! I thought to myself, you either stop staring at the spoon if you're not gonna say anything, or you go up there and nicely tell them that you this is the most dirtiest spoon ever and they should wash the spoons before giving it to people to stir their drinks!
After contemplating for what felt like 10 seconds (lol) I decided to take out my notepad and pen and wrote a small note and left it next to my empty coffee cup. My biggest regret after I walked out however, was not being able to see their reaction to my note. But oh well, I want them to be careful next time. I don't want the place to lose customers over slip ups of this kind.
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All in all, love your mother- do not take her for granted, because one day you will end up losing her, and you will regret that you have either not spent enough time with her, haven't showered her with all your love or you couldn't even say to her face-to-face that you love her (and saying it on social media just doesn't cut it). Love her with all thy heart, as she has always loved you, even during the times where she can't be more disappointed or upset at you.
Don't wait until it's too late- too late where even when you just wanted to embrace her or hear her laugh at your silly jokes and dance moves, you can't do that anymore....
